9: What If Hope Scares You Silly?
This is the story about a house, a baby, and a hope disappointed.
Lisa-Jo and Christie get real honest this week as they wonder out loud if hope really is a risk worth taking. Because what if you're disappointed. What does that say about the God you believed and hoped in? What does that say about you?
They both share their riskiest hope stories today. How they were both deeply disappointed and then what came next.
They'd love to hear what your experiences with hope have been like. Come say hello on Instagram: @lisajobaker and @christiepurifoy . Or use our hashtag #outoftheordinarypodcast
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About 13 years ago I went through a long season of hope & hopelessness. Started out with my beloved Grandma, who I was extremely close to, passed away. 2 months later I had a stroke at 45 that left me paralyzed on my left side. God granted me a miracle & after about a year, He gave me almost total healing. My stroke caused my 13 year old daughter’s anxiety & panic attacks to really flair up. That started about 5 years of testing, medications, therapy & different drs until we finally found the correct diagnosis & treatment. During those years caused a lot of heartache & depression for both my daughter & I. She had to leave her private Christian school at the end of 10th grade that she’d gone to since kindergarten & finsh by independent studies at home. By doing that she lost all her friends & became reclusive & depressed. It was also extremely hard for me to see her suffering & seeming to fail at trying to find the right help her for so long. It was heartbreaking to see her ache for friends & not being able to do anything about it. It took a huge toll on my marriage & also on my relationship with my older son. Hearing all of my friends talk about their kids going to prom, dances & all the fun things that high school students do while my daughter was suffering at home alone left me feeling bitter, jealous & hurt, feelings I hated.
My church was falling apart, we’d both worked for my Dad & when he closed the businesswe had some very hurtful things done to us by my parents as well as both out of a job at the same time. Then about 7 years ago 1 of 2 of my closest friends completely devastated me by turning & attacking me at all my weakest places & the other friend just faded away with no explanation. All of this together felt like I had lost everything & left me praying for 1 whole year for God to please take me home. Since He didn’t answer that prayer, I threw myself at His feet & totally surrendered my will to Him & dedicated my life to learning who He wanted me to be as a wife, mom, friend, daughter & woman. I’d been a Christian my whole life but wasn’t until this that I learned the difference between being saved & surrendered. It took a lot of hard work, pain & time but God restored my marriage, my relationship with my children, brought me to a new church, gave me so many new friends I can hardly keep up with them. He completely made me into a new & better person, I am now filled with His joy, peace & love.
Even though I felt hopeless through most all of this, hope was the only thing I had left.
Now the last several years I’m holding onto hope for my son & daughter in law are blessed to be able to get pregnant & have a baby of their own.
Sorry for the book but that’s my story, at least part of it.
Blessings,
Loree
I’m so grateful for every word you’ve shared here. Your story is powerful. Beautiful and hard, but oh so, powerful. Thank you for passing it on to me. I treasure your experience. with gratitude, Christie
I found myself in tears as I listened to your stories today. Particularly Lisa-Jo’s story of hope being taken away and given back to her. I have had that experience of hope being taken away and I am wondering what to do with my disappointment.
The image you both gave of a gritty hope is so on the money. Hope is uncomfortable and yet I find I still want to hold on to it. Thank you for speaking into my circumstances today.
Thank you for this comment, Jodie. I am so glad to know this conversation struck a chord with you. May you hold on to that hope until its promise is fulfilled.
This was absolutely perfect timing. Tears rolling down my face as I was on my walk this morning listening. God knew when I needed this. We are a military family and it’s that time again of a potential move. We have 4 years left until my husband can retire, and we are craving roots to be planted somewhere for our family of 5… Your words of encouragement and insight have been just what my soul has needed. I loved listening to your stories and how you came out of it. I told my husband last night, I don’t want to hope, I don’t want to wait on God, but, I am so desperate for him, and I need Him. He knows what will happen and will knows my heart desires even more than I do. Thank you both, love the podcast!!!
Warmly,
Thank you, Meagan! We are so, so glad to know that this conversation met you just where you are. Bless you!
I am sitting in my office this afternoon catching up on podcasts and so far, I believe this one on HOPE, is my favorite. Hope, being the theme of my life since late 2002. I loved both of your stories of deferred hope and truly testaments of “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12.” Keep up the good podcasts gals – I’m a grandma and I love them.
Thank you, Susan! That verse is one of my favorites.